Are you still dating?

Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man. (Proverbs 3:3-4 NIV)

Let love and faithfulness never leave you. We need to take a moment and hear those words out loud. Repeat them and think on them for a minute, I’ll wait…

Let love and faithfulness never leave you is what the Lord says to us. How did that sit with you? I love these words because it’s a good reminder for me. That means in our tired state, our busy state, our stressful state, and in every other emotional state, we need to always love and be faithful to our husbands.

God is saying always keep love going, always keep it alive, always have it with you and never let it leave you. So that means we need to be active in our love for our husbands. That means we shouldn’t expect our feelings to be known. We need to communicate our feelings, show our feelings, and express our feelings. Those are the ways to love and be faithful.

When is the last time you and your husband went on a date? For my husband and I, it’s been at least two months…? I really couldn’t tell you. That is bad! That is not keeping love and faithfulness around my neck, with me everyday and every where I go. When is the last time you acted as boyfriend & girlfriend, with long cute conversations if you’re away from each other, or surprise messages, random meet ups, or anything that expresses what you feel for him? For myself, it’s been a year or so…? That is not good!! How can we say we love our husbands but not put the effort into our marriages? Just like everything else that matters, (being a disciple for Christ, being a good mom, being good at your profession, etc.) it all takes work and effort to grow and be strong. 

We need to be dating our husbands. If we’re honest, most of us, including myself, no longer date. We are blessed and we give thanks for having our husbands, but we no longer date like we once did before nuptials. When we find ourselves stressed, frustrated, or irritated with our husbands, it is an indicator that we need some one on one time. No kids, no cell phones, no TV, no video games, etc. Just one on one intentional time, purposely carved out for you and your man. You will see that it will change your marriage for the better. We must remind ourselves, God wants us to last. God wants us to be romantic, intimate, best friends, close, and have a bond like no other.

Let’s explore the tips for dating.


  • Date Once a Week

    • This could be going Out or at Home. If you have children, it needs to be after they have gone to bed. The point is to spend intentional time with each other, look into each others’ eyes, and talk or reflect.
    • This could be with a meal or without a meal. With a movie or without a movie. Make it outside under a cistern lantern (for mosquitos) or by a fire if the season is right.
    • Be romantic on some dates, be fun and spontaneous on other dates, and be silly and goofy on random dates.
  • Rendezvous Once a Month

    • Random meet ups. With some jobs we hold it isn’t possible to randomly meet up, but you can arrange a day to meet for lunch or quick stop by.
    • Rendezvous at a hotel. No need to go any further, you see where I’m going.
    • Be spontaneous and adventurous. Romantically and/or physically. Set up for you both to sky dive…? Anything that is out of the norm is the point. Go rock climbing. Google and Pinterest are excellent sources for ideas. Search adventurous couples’ activities.
  • Ask Him What He Wants To Do

    • Every now and then you may need to sit down and watch football. You might need to go out to a sports’ bar and watch a boxing match etc. I happen to love football, but I am not into boxing or cage matches at ALL. But I am committing to do or participate in something that doesn’t benefit me at all, once in a while won’t hurt.
    • What interests your husband? Set up that activity and surprise him with it. My husband loves fishing, anything fishing and football. I am committing to set up for he and I to go fishing. My husband would be so shocked, I don’t think he would believe it. What is something that would shock your husband if you participated in one of his interests or hobbies?
    • Ask his friends. If you aren’t sure how to coordinate a fishing charter or a hunting trip or something that you know your husband would love, ask his friends! I’m sure they will know and they would probably feel honored you asked them. Remember men love being the source of information for manly things.

I will be praying for us wives this week as we discuss this topic with our husbands. I pray God speaks to you and him in this area. Praying the tips above spark courageous ideas for your marriage. I am so grateful God used me to give these tips because I am taking note as well. Be blessed ladies and do not forget to communicate love, show love, and express love always!! 

May the Lord make your love increase and overflow for each other. (1 Thessalonians 3:12 NIV)

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